Question: I am 15 and I have a boyfriend, 16, we have only had sex [intercourse] once...but I have like those longer labia I guess, but only one is longer, the left one, and the right is "normal" (the longer one is also darker in color than the shorter one, like it seems to protrude 3cm [1.2in] past my outer labia, and like I don’t want him to see that part of me because people aren't very understanding with this...at this age anyway, and well he wants to "explore" my vaginal area and I don't know what to do because of this...he hasn't noticed it yet, even though we had sex. I don’t think, I'm almost certain he hasn't, but well what should I do? We have been "going out" for 2 months or more and I don't know if I want him to know about this quite yet, what should I do?? Would it be acceptable if I held it out of the way while he is exploring me just so my clitoris is more exposed to him and also so I can keep my longer labia hidden...?....is there anyway to get this removed?

Another question, for as long as I can remember I have had like these little bumps on I think my vulva area like where my clitoris is and they aren’t in odd patterns or anything, they look like pores clogged with white stuff...its not a white head either but like if I press one like a pimple, this whitish stuff comes out, they aren't large at all....maybe like the size of like an asterisk * or two combined. What is it? I have had them my entire life,...

PLEASE HELP ME..... I have looked everywhere for answers and your site is the only one that has helped me as far as feeling normal among the female population and not a freak....but I still feel different from my peers, could you give me a percentage of women who have this, like how abnormal is this?

Answer: It is important that you understand and accept that you are only different, not abnormal or weird. Having large uneven inner labia is very common. Unfortunately, people often have unrealistic expectations of what women's genitals should look like. It is best to let him know now before the relationship becomes even more serious. Emotionally, it will be far worse on you if you wait to tell him and he rejects you. Do you really want a partner who will reject you because of the size and shape of your labia? Do not pretend to be someone you are not just to keep a partner, it just isn't worth it. Any guy should feel lucky to have sex with you and most guys do not have the option of picking and choosing. If he rejects you then that likely means he was just using you. If he really cares for you, he will accept you as you really are. You may need to educate him to the fact that your labia are perfectly normal. Do not allow him to dictate what you should look like, especially since he really does not know, he is only guessing.

More can be read about this topic on the page about Clitoral and Labia Size.

I am not sure of what the cause of the bumps on your vulva is. It sounds like your oil, sebaceous, glands may be producing too much sebum, an oily lubricant, and are partially or completely plugged. These glands usually kick into high gear during puberty. An infection is usually indicated by redness around the site of the infection, like in the case of acne. As long as there is no evidence of infection and there is no pain or soreness I would not be concerned about these little pumps. If there is rednes or pain, please bring them to the attention of a doctor.